The holidays are upon us -- and so is the time of the year when a lot of people get stressed out and overwhelmed, and feel like it's a never-ending bother. Relatives want to get together, and inevitably, the old arguments and kidding will repeat themselves. Families repeat endless cycles of interaction, and almost everybody feels helpless to break out.
Perhaps you don't realize it -- or do, but still feel powerless -- but you can change these patterns this year. You can create a happier, more joyful and brighter holiday than you've ever had before. All it takes is the will to change, and making an effort -- small baby steps this year, bigger ones next.
These six tips will help you get started to making your holidays happier.
6 Tips To Reduce Stress This Holiday Season
1. Do Something Un-Materialistic This Season(01 of06)
Remember the holidays aren't just about shopping.All too often we get caught up in the shopping, the endless sales, the "need" to make sure we buy something for everyone, that we lose sight of things that really matter -- our friendships, our family, our spirituality, our fellow man (and woman) who may be less fortunate than us. Even in tough economic times (some might say, especially in such times), others need our help even when we feel we have little to offer. Volunteer at a food bank, do something additional for your church, adopt a family in need this season. If you cut just 10 percent of your spending on gifts and donated that money to charity, you'd be surprised at how much a difference such giving would help. As an added bonus, research shows such giving makes us feel better about ourselves, too. (credit:<a href="http://www.flickr.com/" role="link" rel="nofollow" class=" js-entry-link cet-external-link" data-vars-item-name="Flickr" data-vars-item-type="text" data-vars-unit-name="5b9c9458e4b03a1dcc7ffe09" data-vars-unit-type="buzz_body" data-vars-target-content-id="http://www.flickr.com/" data-vars-target-content-type="url" data-vars-type="web_external_link" data-vars-subunit-name="before_you_go_slideshow" data-vars-subunit-type="component" data-vars-position-in-subunit="10" data-vars-position-in-unit="10">Flickr</a>:<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/72067179@N00/6959643784" role="link" rel="nofollow" class=" js-entry-link cet-external-link" data-vars-item-name="LindsayT..." data-vars-item-type="text" data-vars-unit-name="5b9c9458e4b03a1dcc7ffe09" data-vars-unit-type="buzz_body" data-vars-target-content-id="http://www.flickr.com/photos/72067179@N00/6959643784" data-vars-target-content-type="url" data-vars-type="web_external_link" data-vars-subunit-name="before_you_go_slideshow" data-vars-subunit-type="component" data-vars-position-in-subunit="11" data-vars-position-in-unit="11">LindsayT...</a>)
2. Give Up The Guilt And Give Yourself A Break(02 of06)
While rushing around during the holidays, we often put ourselves last on the "to do" list. We also feel guilty when we indulge in things we wouldn't ordinarily indulge in ("Another piece of pie? Why, thank you!"). Give yourself a break this season, forgive your transgressions, and be kind to yourself. That means taking some time out for yourself and your needs, even if it's just a few minutes of solitude in the morning or before you go to bed that you can relax, catch up a crossword puzzle or some reading, and just enjoy your own company. It also means not beating yourself if you step off your diet or can't get to the gym for a few days. More people cause themselves more anxiety and stress about beating themselves up over such decisions, when the resulting difference is almost always negligible. If you're feeling blue or lonely during the holidays, join the crowd. So here are 10 things you can do if you find yourself alone. (credit:Shutterstock)
3. Moderation In All Things(03 of06)
We often get into trouble by over-indulging in things. Whether it's food, drink, or just the amount of time we spend with relatives, it's easy to go overboard.Aristotle knew a thing or two of what he was talking about a few thousand years ago, and yet it's a lesson many of us forget. While the holidays are a good "excuse" to stop being moderate in our drinking or eating, we should resist the urge to overindulge. Sure, you can have an extra piece of cake or one extra drink more than you might usually enjoy, but that shouldn't open the floodgates to eat the remaining half of the cake or finish off a half-bottle of Jack Daniels on your own. In the same way, even buying presents for your kids can be taken to an unhealthy extreme ("always leave them wanting more"). Celebrate, but not to the point of excess. (credit:<a href="http://www.flickr.com/" role="link" rel="nofollow" class=" js-entry-link cet-external-link" data-vars-item-name="Flickr" data-vars-item-type="text" data-vars-unit-name="5b9c9458e4b03a1dcc7ffe09" data-vars-unit-type="buzz_body" data-vars-target-content-id="http://www.flickr.com/" data-vars-target-content-type="url" data-vars-type="web_external_link" data-vars-subunit-name="before_you_go_slideshow" data-vars-subunit-type="component" data-vars-position-in-subunit="5" data-vars-position-in-unit="5">Flickr</a>:<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/64726139@N03/6964807599" role="link" rel="nofollow" class=" js-entry-link cet-external-link" data-vars-item-name="Fifth World Art" data-vars-item-type="text" data-vars-unit-name="5b9c9458e4b03a1dcc7ffe09" data-vars-unit-type="buzz_body" data-vars-target-content-id="http://www.flickr.com/photos/64726139@N03/6964807599" data-vars-target-content-type="url" data-vars-type="web_external_link" data-vars-subunit-name="before_you_go_slideshow" data-vars-subunit-type="component" data-vars-position-in-subunit="6" data-vars-position-in-unit="6">Fifth World Art</a>)
4. Organization Does Wonders, So Plan Ahead(04 of06)
Feeling overwhelmed by too much to do and too little time to do it? Schedule it all out right now on your favorite calendar or planner. Then stick to it. Too many people get into trouble accepting last-minute invitations, or by trying to accommodate a last-minute visit with someone they hadn't planned on seeing. If your schedule allows for it, fine, but if not, you'll know in an instant. (credit:Shutterstock)
5. Know When To Say 'No,' And Know When To Ask For Help(05 of06)
We're all human (yes, you too!), and we humans get ourselves into more trouble than you know because we simply don't know when to say, "Thank you, but no." I suspect it's tied closely to guilt and not taking time for ourselves, but at some point, the sooner we learn that it's okay to say "no," the sooner we'll feel less stress and anxiety. You can't do everything.Ask for help from your significant other, children, friends or family when you need it. Be direct and honest with your requests, and don't expect others to read your mind. For instance, if you decorate the tree every year, but this year find you won't have the time, ask someone to do it for you (don't just assume people will see the bare tree and offer their help). Don't stop at a single request if you need help with a dozen different things, either. (credit:<a href="http://www.flickr.com/" role="link" rel="nofollow" class=" js-entry-link cet-external-link" data-vars-item-name="Flickr" data-vars-item-type="text" data-vars-unit-name="5b9c9458e4b03a1dcc7ffe09" data-vars-unit-type="buzz_body" data-vars-target-content-id="http://www.flickr.com/" data-vars-target-content-type="url" data-vars-type="web_external_link" data-vars-subunit-name="before_you_go_slideshow" data-vars-subunit-type="component" data-vars-position-in-subunit="3" data-vars-position-in-unit="3">Flickr</a>:<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/99837685@N00/8235727687" role="link" rel="nofollow" class=" js-entry-link cet-external-link" data-vars-item-name="Matt Ryall" data-vars-item-type="text" data-vars-unit-name="5b9c9458e4b03a1dcc7ffe09" data-vars-unit-type="buzz_body" data-vars-target-content-id="http://www.flickr.com/photos/99837685@N00/8235727687" data-vars-target-content-type="url" data-vars-type="web_external_link" data-vars-subunit-name="before_you_go_slideshow" data-vars-subunit-type="component" data-vars-position-in-subunit="4" data-vars-position-in-unit="4">Matt Ryall</a>)
6. Take Time Off From Old Family Feuds, Arguments And Disputes(06 of06)
Most of us love most of our relatives and families, but even then, there can be old arguments and wounds that seem to magically re-open at about this same time every year. We get into disagreements or sometimes full-fledged arguments with others we care about. We often find ourselves regressing to old familiar reactions and behaviors during holiday gatherings.In the spirit of the giving season, give something that is priceless -- your compassion and forgiveness (even if only temporary) to those in your life you feel have wronged you in some way. Give the gift of disengagement from others who would pick a fight -- you'll be the better person for it. (credit:<a href="http://www.flickr.com/" role="link" rel="nofollow" class=" js-entry-link cet-external-link" data-vars-item-name="Flickr" data-vars-item-type="text" data-vars-unit-name="5b9c9458e4b03a1dcc7ffe09" data-vars-unit-type="buzz_body" data-vars-target-content-id="http://www.flickr.com/" data-vars-target-content-type="url" data-vars-type="web_external_link" data-vars-subunit-name="before_you_go_slideshow" data-vars-subunit-type="component" data-vars-position-in-subunit="1" data-vars-position-in-unit="1">Flickr</a>:<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/26786784@N08/8238944490" role="link" rel="nofollow" class=" js-entry-link cet-external-link" data-vars-item-name="MrGuilt" data-vars-item-type="text" data-vars-unit-name="5b9c9458e4b03a1dcc7ffe09" data-vars-unit-type="buzz_body" data-vars-target-content-id="http://www.flickr.com/photos/26786784@N08/8238944490" data-vars-target-content-type="url" data-vars-type="web_external_link" data-vars-subunit-name="before_you_go_slideshow" data-vars-subunit-type="component" data-vars-position-in-subunit="2" data-vars-position-in-unit="2">MrGuilt</a>)
Need more ideas for coping with the holidays? Check out Psych Central's Guide to Coping with the Holidays.
For more by Dr. John Grohol, click here.
For more on stress, click here.
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