Hey Ladies! 10 Tips to Make New Friends | HuffPost Life

Tried and true strategies for making friends.

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Author, Blogger, Journalist in Chicago

Author, Blogger, Journalist in Chicago

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The last time I made a conscious effort to win over potential BFFs I was an awkward, eager 18-year-old -- one of about 2,000 college freshman looking for the same thing -- so I was feeling a little rusty when I started this search. But when you cannonball into the friend-dating pool, you learn a lot ... fast.

Here are the strategies I've developed so far. These have all worked for me personally, and helped me fill my days with new pals (if not yet a local BFF per se ... the forever part takes time!).

Call it Friend Finding (Woman Wooing?) 101. The tips may seem obvious, but the no-brainers are always the easiest to forget.

10 Tips to Make Friends

Facebook Is There For A Reason(01 of10)

You may have 50 online friends who live in your area but whom you've only met once. I subscribe to the belief that if we can be virtual friends, we can be the face-to-face kind. Reach out to anyone in your Facebook network (or MySpace or Friendster, if those sites even still exist) you think might have potential. Utilizing the Facebook message system gives your approach a casual feel before you take the friendship offline.

Make The First Move(02 of10)

If you're a woman who's used to being wooed, you might forget that friend-dating isn't the same as the romantic kind. If you defer to the potential BFF to ask you out, you could be waiting forever. Every girl likes brunch. Just invite her for an omelet.

Tell Your Old Friends You're In The Market For New Ones(03 of10)

After I started my blog, a long-distance friend sent me the names of three girls she knew in Chicago. When I asked her why she hadn't told me about them earlier, she said she'd figured I already had my own crew. Lesson learned.

Make The Second Move, Too(04 of10)

The rules of friendship may call for reciprocation, but until you are actual friends, rules don't apply.

Join, Join, Join(05 of10)

I'm in two book clubs. I've done cardio hip hop classes. Improv classes. Volunteer groups. I want to start a ladies poker game. I've even signed up for a young leadership group with a local religious organization, though until now I've been basically nonpracticing. Groups that meet regularly provide the consistency to turn an acquaintance into a friend into a bestie.

Be Up For Adventure(06 of10)

In other words: say yes to everything, no matter how crazy or dreadful the invitation might seem. It's easier to create an instant bond when you're both outside your comfort zone. Plus, you're more likely to create a memory at a roller rink or fortune teller than a diner.

Give Second Chances(07 of10)

First dates, of any kind, can be awkward. If someone you weren't so keen on asks you to get together again, say yes. One more friend-date can't hurt, and it might turn out that she doesn't truly have a potty mouth, she just curses like a sailor when she's nervous.

Listen(08 of10)

I used to be so worried there would be uncomfortable lulls in conversation that whenever a friend-date spoke, I'd be working on my next line instead of hearing what she was saying. Nothing says "I'm a good friend who listens" like being a good friend who listens. Referencing something she said earlier does not go unnoticed.

Admit Your Girl Crush(09 of10)

We all just want to be liked. If you really feel like there's a mutual connection, some breezy version of "Oh we're totally going to be BFFs!" at the end of the date isn't scary, it's endearing.

Assume Others Are Looking For The Same Thing(10 of10)

Everyone wants good friends. Don't present yourself as the sad sack who can't find anyone to play with at recess. No, you're the strong independent woman who wants to expand your social horizons. Own it.

Did I miss anything? Think any of my tips are off-base? Got advice of your own? Do tell!

You can follow Rachel's awkward and hilarious escapades in her search for a new best friend on her blog, MWF Seeking BFF

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