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20 Things Candidates Absolutely MUST Do During Presidential Primaries

I mean, do you even love America?
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By 

Writer, HuffPost

Based on the low voter turnout in the United States, it's a good bet that most people don't know how political primaries work. Well, there are things every candidate must do if they want to succeed during a caucus. So, rest easy, citizen, you're about to learn how to primary. 

Get ready to roll up those sleeves and then roll up those sleeves!
Brendan Hoffman via Getty Images
Yell things at crowds who are also yelling things!
Anadolu Agency via Getty Images
Sign cowboy hats! If you think you've signed too many cowboys hats, you haven't signed enough cowboy hats!
Stephen Maturen via Getty Images
Bring out the pistol fingers! PEW! PEW! PEW!
Anadolu Agency via Getty Images
Hit those dramatic close-ups! There is no "too close."
JIM WATSON via Getty Images
Hug people who are hugging!
Bloomberg via Getty Images
Get photos from reporters who fell on the ground or are 2 feet tall!
Joshua Lott via Getty Images
Talk about numbers you can illustrate with your fingers on one hand!
Stephen Maturen via Getty Images
Get in close next to someone and look at their phone together!
Steve Pope via Getty Images
Recruit individual people to hold up individual letters! If it spells something out, even better!
JIM WATSON via Getty Images
Make pensive faces while in seas of people!
Al Drago via Getty Images
Return crowd enthusiasm with bigger and bolder enthusiasm! Excite their faces off!
JIM WATSON via Getty Images
Collect the giant severed heads of patriotic eagles!
Justin Sullivan via Getty Images
Hire reality TV stars who like ducks! (Heads attached, ideally.)
Anadolu Agency via Getty Images
Give away smaller, plastic versions of yourself!
Bloomberg via Getty Images
Pass out giant, paper versions of your head!
Steve Pope via Getty Images
Laugh! You're so merry!
Steve Pope via Getty Images
Don't forget the racist football fan demographic! They're people too!
MICHAEL B. THOMAS via Getty Images
Point at the guns.
Brooks Kraft via Getty Images
Look at guns.
Brooks Kraft via Getty Images
Republican presidential candidate Rick Santorum looks at guns during a visit Pelletier's Sports Shop in Jaffrey, NH. (Photo by Brooks Kraft LLC/Corbis via Getty Images)

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If Presidential Candidates Were Given Their Own Lifetime Movies
Lindsey Graham(01 of06)
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Jeb Bush(02 of06)
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Ben Carson(03 of06)
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Donald Trump(04 of06)
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Hillary Clinton(05 of06)
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Bernie Sanders(06 of06)
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